The Stars and the Cookie Jar

Got promoted today.

Rah.

Not allowed to say anything, because no one else in the promotion pool has been told their outcomes yet, but everyone who was on shift with me today saw the DM and RM pumping my hand like an idiot... Wow, I shook hands more today than in the past six months...

Rah.

And rymenhild 's computer took sick and died. :(

Not rah.

On tap tonight, some Russian History AU, if I don't fall the hell asleep the minute I get horizontal.

Yeah, two entries in one night. (Rah.)

Having just thrown my pen against the wall, I thought I'd take a break from the notebooking. (Notebooking is what I do as drafts; if it makes it onto the computer screen, it's pretty near how I want it, mostly because typing using my laptop is, as it ages, such a bitch.)

...random insertion of thought: I'm told I hum when under pressure, usually The Steward of Gondor. Maybe it's because work just reminds me of a death-and-glory cavalry charge, a hundred horse against a legion of nasty archers, most of the time... And now. I'm humming now.

Because I think my muse has gone off to the Demigod Club At The Asp Room, Mt. Mjolnir, (Lower, Lower Level) Ragnarokk, Norway 06666.

(Yes, Sovay, I gacked it from you.)

I think I'm just despairing because this little thing I started, on the threads of one night's interesting dream, is turning into an ur-story thing with Journey to Manhood stamped on it. It's getting rather bigger than a couple frags, and the thing is, when I finish it, what the hell will I do with it, and therefore why should I finish it?

The thing I just finished writing seemed wept out of me, and ended on a sob; it was hugely emotionally emptying, and I'm not hitting the hyperbole there. I felt like something had ripped. And I edited and revised and am putting it to bed for a while to work on the research side. (Two days in the first week of June belong to the Center For Advanced Holocaust Studies in Washington, DC; If I manage to get to Eretz Israel -- can you tell my grandparents were Litvaks? -- I will extend my stay there by at least four days for Yad Vashem and Lohamei haGetaot.)

Now I'm starting this, and it began as a lark, and I have no idea what it's going to be, or whether I should follow it there. It started as a short-short story, because the Random Challenge that day was 'Cain and Abel', and all I wanted was to put Cain in a wrecked world and give him no rest, poor bastard; but now he's fraternized with witches, done some reverse ghost-eating, and is on his beaten, mentally fractured way to Greece. Santorini, actually, if you wanted to know. It's a mercy the royal family did not actually speak Greek at home, because I know nothing beyond 'Chaire!', how to count and say my alphabet, and.... the cow thing...

Well, a bit more. But mostly it was cows.

(hides)