posted by
selkie at 09:17pm on 07/11/2006
I didn't mean to make stuff for the crock pot for tomorrow. I intended to run the dishwasher, pack the lunches, and get out of the kitchen, in favor of tidying up the bedroom.
Then my mother called, and suddenly I found myself pulling out the cutting board, getting the sheepsfoot out of my knife roll, and searching about for raw vegetables. I made it through all the potatoes we had -- admittedly only three pounds -- and was starting to tourne a bunch of carrots when I realised they came from the bag ready-peeled and baby-cut. Then I smashed up a bunch of garlic, holding the phone with my shoulder. Chop. Chop. Chop. Whunk. Smack. I'm sorry, Mother, were you saying something?
And then she kept talking, so I made a sauce. The tail end of some cider, an apple that was starting to go to the bad -- and you should have seen the matchsticks that apple ended in, I think my mother was asking 'When's Whatsherface's birthday, again?' or maybe it was 'Why would you want to pretend to have a married name?' -- nice even matchsticks, NICE, EVEN, MATCHSTICKS, butter, a little bit of brandy, cracked pepper.
She hung up, and I was looking at a cutting board full of vegetables and a saucier full of stuff.
Uh.
My inspiration in the kitchen, gentle readers. My mother.
Then my mother called, and suddenly I found myself pulling out the cutting board, getting the sheepsfoot out of my knife roll, and searching about for raw vegetables. I made it through all the potatoes we had -- admittedly only three pounds -- and was starting to tourne a bunch of carrots when I realised they came from the bag ready-peeled and baby-cut. Then I smashed up a bunch of garlic, holding the phone with my shoulder. Chop. Chop. Chop. Whunk. Smack. I'm sorry, Mother, were you saying something?
And then she kept talking, so I made a sauce. The tail end of some cider, an apple that was starting to go to the bad -- and you should have seen the matchsticks that apple ended in, I think my mother was asking 'When's Whatsherface's birthday, again?' or maybe it was 'Why would you want to pretend to have a married name?' -- nice even matchsticks, NICE, EVEN, MATCHSTICKS, butter, a little bit of brandy, cracked pepper.
She hung up, and I was looking at a cutting board full of vegetables and a saucier full of stuff.
Uh.
My inspiration in the kitchen, gentle readers. My mother.
(no subject)
Your rage is delicious!
(no subject)
(no subject)
Man, what is it with people's parents sucking lately?
There should be a Coalition Against Sucktastic Parents.
(no subject)
(Socially acceptable excuse to play with knives and fire. KNIVES AND FIRE, baby.)
(no subject)